Wednesday, February 9, 2011


The day you become a mother, some gene in your distant chemical make up must switch on. It not only turns on, but it goes into overdrive, and despite your best intentions to NOT be run by instinct and to rule with a calm head, somehow this crazy Mom Gene hijacks your damn brain and settles in for a long, long time.

You can distinguish the cry of your infant in a sea of babies. You can be in a sound sleep one moment, and halfway down the hallway in another, without even knowing what it was that woke you up and sent you sprinting.

Whenever somebody messes up with your child, you have an overwhelming urge to take over completely and never let them be in that situation ever again.

When you are so sick you can barely stand or you accidentally take Tylenol PM in the middle of the day, you still have a sense of "must take care of the child at all costs." Even if it means you will never, ever recover. Or that you will always, always catch whatever it is said child is sick with.

It is this stupid gene, tragically, that men lack. And the longer you are a mother, the more apparent it becomes that they really are from another freaking planet. One where they hunt, copulate, and admire themselves while the women protect the future of the species. Women may claim to have found a man who treats their child the same way they do, but I'm calling bullshit right now. Impossible! They care. They may even attempt to help. But mom = nuture, and despite my best attempts at sharing that role, it has become increasingly obvious that DH is just doing the best that he can and the ultimate survival and well-being of my son is totally up to me!

Sorry, just a little rant after reading about sick familieis....and more Dads who whine in beds with fevers while the equally sick mother cares for the sick kids. The equally sick mother who consequently makes more money than said Dad and already worked an insanely hard and stressful day at work.

:) I wouldn't be opposed to tweaking this genome some day.

1 comment:

SixTwoThree said...

Just getting caught up! Well written, funny post.