I'm Alive!

Seriously, I feel like #5 today.

It was my first time in the ocean since Dave Martin was attacked by a Great White in Solana Beach back in April. Dave died while swimming with a group of his triathlon team members, doing a morning practice that every one of us sort of takes for granted. I don't. I was flipping out about this return to the ocean since it hit the workout calendar. I know that the odds are excruciatingly low and that sharks don't seek us humans out when we are swimming, but it really hit far too close to home for me and I found myself thinking about it non-stop over the past few months.

I honestly don't know how I didn't cry my eyes out as I hit the water with my team and headed out to the first buoy. I guess I just felt like I needed to get this done to overcome my fear....you know, this "Year of Overcoming Fears" has sort of bled into two years, and I'm grabbing life by the balls and trying to deal with my emotions. So I followed my group, stayed in the middle until I felt comfortable, and then went about my mile swim.

Was it pleasurable? Hell no. But somehow the thought of shark was tempered by Sublime's "Caress Me Down" (I got this cool new music phone and I have some really random favorites that I listened to before I got in the water) and I just held off the bad thoughts. But I did think of Dave out there. How he probably didn't know what was happening and was hopefully enjoying his swim before he was bitten. And how he would probably be right back out there in the water swimming if it had happened to somebody else.

Anyway, didn't mean to go so off course with this post. Was originally intending it to be tongue in cheek, but I can't deny the fact that with every stroke, I thought of this man I never had the honor of meeting. While what happened to him gave me this fear, I do think that somehow he got me through that swim today, too.

Dave, rest in peace. Thanks for the swim.