Gluttony

Guilty! Guilty, guilty, guilty, guilty, and guilty! One for each of my personalities: Chocolate, Peanut Butter, White Bread, Cookie, Brownie, and Dean & Deluca Candy Peach.

Why must there be so many temptations this time of the year? And why I am hatin' on life so much that I'm one of the first to raid the gift baskets when they hit the kitchen at work? Last year, I was such a food snob. "Oh, no, I can't eat that. It's a slippery sloap. No sirree!" I got a reputation for being the food snob. "Better watch out, Joe Blow, Mtngirlincali might get sick if she sees you eating that Big Mac and french fries." Not now. She may ask if she can have a few.

What is up with this? I went through a major transformation in my life 3 years ago. I dropped 38 lbs before my wedding, and I've since gained 8 back. It's horrible, and I don't want them there, but they don't seem to want to go away. And with the way I've been eating lately, I wouldn't be surprised if even more join them! I'm just so frustrated, but weight loss is a frame of mind. You have to want it. You have to commit to the sacrifices you WILL have to make, because you have a greater goal in mind. I need that goal now. I need that focus. There is no more wedding dress to squeeze into. There is no more "vision" of what I might be able to look like. I just need to pull from within and get a grip on the PLAN, and stick to it.

How's this for motivation, Self? In your new favorite sport, speed is achieved by a number of means. There's talent, of course. There's aerodynamics. And there's WEIGHT..... People are buying carbon bikes, carbon water bottle holders, lightweight wheels..... all to get a lighter bike. Well hell, you can save yourself a thousand dollars if you lose a few pounds off of YOUR body, not your bike. Surely that must be an excellent solution and motivation? And who won your age group in your 5K this weekend? The thin-as-a-rail chickie, that's who! Big boobs, a spare tire, and a big badonkadonk don't make for speed. LOSE THE WEIGHT, Chubmeister. Put the cookie down. Remember what it's like to cross the finish line, and think about doing it with GOOD race photos!


....okay, not so sure that worked, but I have to start somewhere.

We leave for Colorado on Saturday, and I am dreading the drive. For once, I'd just like to chill out and not be torn between families on Christmas day. To be honest, I haven't even given much thought to our "plan" once we are there, but I think I will be selfish and just do what I want to do. I need a day of shopping on my own once I get there. I want to be alone.

Work is insane, but I got a raise next year, so I am pleased. Good thing I've signed up for the 7:30pm training session with our tri club next month.....I'll probably be at work that late every night! They will definitely be making me earn my keep this coming year, of that I am sure.

So enough from me. I'm going to go yell at my stomach in the mirror and then head to sleep.